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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27747451">The way you love her is tragic</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anewhope303/pseuds/Anewhope303'>Anewhope303</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Tragedy, Cannon compliant, F/M, Get some tissues, Heartbreak, Hurt No Comfort, I Will Go Down With This Ship, I cried while writing this, Musings on the Nature of Love, Not Actually Unrequited Love, POV Second Person, Sad Ending, Sad and Beautiful, Self Loathing, Tragic Romance, i think, really fucking sad, then heartbreak, tros sucks yet here I am</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 20:15:18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>690</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27747451</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anewhope303/pseuds/Anewhope303</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>You’re falling in love with her, there’s nothing to be done about it</p><p>And love hurts, especially when you’re the monster in this story</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>19</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The way you love her is tragic</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I’m sorry, I needed to write something angsty I hope it’s cathartic for you</p><p>I would recommend listening to a sad song while reading this</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You’re falling in love with her, there’s nothing to be done about it</p><p>And love hurts, especially when you’re the monster in this story </p><p>Pain is a constant in your life, this shouldn’t bother you, but it feels so different than the other scars you bear</p><p>It feels almost pleasant to burn in the fires of her eyes, the most beautiful trauma to feel the parts of your heart you tried to lock down, break free from their cage and fly straight into her arms.</p><p>That’s what scares you most about it, she has more power over you than she likely realizes and she could destroy you so easily and you can't seem to care cause you love her.</p><p>And the way you love her is pure, tragic, terrible and beautiful at the same time.</p><p>But you know she’ll never return your feelings.</p><p>You can’t fathom the idea of someone loving you after all you have done, when you can’t even love yourself </p><p>She’s the hero in this story, and you’re the monster she’ll slay in the end, remember?</p><p>So you except the fact that this love is one sided with as much grace as you can manage, and you try to continue fighting her, try to continue being the monster her story needs you to be, but something's changed within you</p><p>Love, even without her knowing, has a way of healing your broken parts</p><p>And maybe, just maybe, you were never the monster after all</p><p>You were just broken</p><p>———-</p><p>You love her, and you don’t care if you’re the monster anymore cause now she’s dead, drained of life from fighting a monster bigger than you could ever have been. </p><p>You’re filled with desperate despair and and since no one is here to help you bring her back, you know what you have to do</p><p>You hold her body close, closer than you’ve ever been and try to memorize what she feels like in your arms as the tears fall from your eyes </p><p>The way you love her is tragic, you were always going to die for her, and you understand that she saved you just by existing, and that alone is worth your life.</p><p>You just never expected it to be like this.</p><p>——-</p><p>You wake to a hand cradling your head and another laying gently on your stomach</p><p>You don’t know how you were pulled out of the darkness and quite frankly, you don’t care cause he’s here with you and he’s looking at you like your every star in the universe and more</p><p>You love him, you loved him even when you tried to hate him, you loved him when it didn’t make sense and you love him now that it finally does</p><p>Now you can trace the lines of his face with your fingers and and stare into his pretty dark eyes and know that he loves you too and you can be free from it all now </p><p>But when you kiss him, his lips are cold</p><p>The pieces fall into place as he grows colder and you cling to him tighter, willing him not to leave you </p><p>As he smiles his beautiful smile and holds your hand for the last seconds of his life, as you watch the constellations in his eyes blink out one by one, you try not to scream and rage against the galaxy for taking him from you</p><p>He falls to the ground and a part of your soul dies away with him, and The universe feels faded and grey as you returned to your friends and put on a brave face as you embrace your friends and try to push past the celebration </p><p>They ask You how you did it, how you managed to kill both terrible monsters and you respond by running away and Finally breaking down and crying angry tears for your love.</p><p>You're the hero of this story, remember? You slayed the monster and saved the day, you should be allowed to keep him, right? Where's your happy ending?</p><p>But the way he loved you was tragic, and there was no other way this story could have ended.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Kudos and comments are appreciated</p></blockquote></div></div>
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